Letters To My Children: To My Daughter On Her 4th Birthday {Kinley}

My dearest Kinley,

I can’t believe I am writing a letter to my newly 4-year-old. When I held you for the first time, I could only imagine a time when I could have a conversation with you. Now that day is here, and let me tell you — you have a lot of {adorable} wisdom to share.

This past year has been filled with many moments of pure joy, excessive laughter, loads of questions, and of course — challenges.

Aside from the typical kid sassiness and potty woes, many of our challenges have revolved around our differing personalities. Being the type of person who jumps right into things, I often have to take a step back and think about what is best for YOU. You are not one to jump in — and I am slowly learning not to push it and force you into situations you are not comfortable with. I know I need to choose my battles wisely, but go a tad easier on me and understand that occasional discomfort and pushing boundaries is good for you. You are my first child; an experiment, and I don’t always know what I am doing. We need to help each other out and work together.

On that note, your first week of preschool wasn’t the smoothest. You were not thrilled that I was leaving you. A few weeks in, and now you really look forward to it. I am loving the mix of kids in your class — I know we picked the perfect school for you and I know you are happy there. We’ll see if next year holds another year of preschool or pre-K, but know I am so proud of you for being brave and conquering your anxiety. You are coming out of your shell in public, and it is SO cool to watch. I love it when you show others the fun personality I get to see at home.

One way you show me I am getting things right is through your faith. You never forget to pray at night and ask about God daily — both things that have forced me to look inside my faith, which I confess, wavers at times. Sometimes the questions you ask are simply explained with science {“How does God make it rain?”} but others are very introspective {“Why are some people born lucky, and some unlucky?” and “Why did God make people?”). If there is one thing I want you to know it’s to never stop asking questions. I may not always have an answer, but asking questions is the only way problems get solved. The more you know, the more intelligence you gain, and believe me — you can never have too much knowledge!

On a funny note, almost every thought in your head now is followed by drama. I’ve had to convince you a few times that I would never force you to pierce your ears {the thought horrifies you}, and you are distraught about growing up. I assure you — the best is yet to come, but I do occasionally wish I could bottle up your adorableness at this age. More about your current personality:

• You love the color blue and dislike most things pink and “too girly” {your words}. You’d prefer Spiderman to a princess any day. {Keep the strength in your convictions.}
• You pretty much consider peanut butter a food group and nearly cried the day I explained food allergies and why we couldn’t bring a peanut butter snack to preschool. You felt so sad knowing that not every child can enjoy peanut butter like you. {Keep your big heart forever.}
• You insist on dressing yourself. It used to make me crazy, but now I embrace it. The outfits you come up with sometimes make me secretly bonkers, but seeing the joy on your face when you come downstairs and twirl for me make it worth it. {Keep on being an original.}
• Arts and crafts are starting to be one of your other favorite things to do, and I beamed ear-to-ear when your teacher told me you color very well for your age. The moment a box shows up at our doorstep, you are pulling out markers and stickers in hopes of making another rocket ship. {Keep up the creativity.}
• You love exploring the outdoors, and come alive when talking about nature. During the past 4 years, I have cleaned more than my fair share of rocks, sticks, leaves and pinecones out of our vehicles. {Keep exploring and respecting nature.}

When it comes to your siblings, you take your role as big sister seriously and say the cutest things, like how you want one more brother, but you’d settle for a dinosaur, and that “Baby Miles smells like sugar and flowers.” You and Karina are the best of friends, and even though you fight at times, you are quick to forgive and forget. You run to greet Miles each morning with a kiss, and he smiles up a storm watching you. I hope your love for your brother and sister lasts forever.

Thanks for teaching me so much about life, patience, and myself these past 4 years, Kinley. You are such a blessing and I don’t take a single day for granted with you. Keep growing, and shoot for the moon. I just know you will land among the stars.

Kisses,

Mom