Sibling Preparation: Getting Kids Ready For a New Baby

Nothing has been consuming my mind more over these past few weeks than how my girls, Karina – age 2 {in 17 days} and Kinley – 3.5, are going to react to their new baby brother, who is due to arrive in 3 weeks+/-.

Kinley has been there, done that, and I know she will be helpful. At the same time, she’s stuck between that age of needing a bit of independence yet also still needy herself at times. Overall, I think it should be OK for her, but I’ve been doing everything I can to help her prepare for the changes ahead.

Karina is another story. She IS needy. She’s at that fun age that will throw a temper tantrum at the first notion of not getting her way. I’d be lying if I wasn’t a bit nervous to see what a baby will do to her temperament. I seem to often mis-judge what my kids can handle, so I am holding out hope it goes smoother than I think it will!

Here’s some tips for getting kids ready for a new baby that have seemed to help me so far:

Rent LOTS of kid-friendly books from the library about new babies and pregnancy.

Books can be incredibly helpful — especially with older kids. Books have helped teach my kids that babies sleep a lot at first, and will need lots of my attention. One that is well-loved in our house is The New Baby from the Little Critter series.

Let them help clean and prepare baby items.

With each item I’ve gotten out and put away, I’ve talked to them about how we will use it. For example, the baby will need the swing for short naps, and you can rock him in it gently if you’d like. I will use the Boppy while I nurse, which will be several times a day at first. I want them familiar with all the tools so they can help me when needed and begin to understand that those items are for him and mommy.

Make a visual of when baby is coming. 

I get constant questions from my big girl about when baby is arriving, so we made a paper chain to count down the approximate days until he comes. It has been a GREAT visual for her to see how much longer it will be. She tears off a piece of the chain every day.

Allow your children to pick out baby’s coming home outfit. 

Although our little outfit keeps disappearing from my hospital bag because my girls like to “show” him daily.

Expose them to new babies.

Thankfully, we have a few newborns around us to check out. Kinley is always wanting to see and hold the baby, while Karina goes nuts when I hold another baby. She slowly seems to be warming up though and trying to “help” them. I’m going to have to give her a bit of free rein with the baby to explore him and will just have my fingers crossed she doesn’t try to pick him up when I go to the bathroom for 2 minutes!

Use a Smartphone app to show and discuss what is happening with baby.

My girls love seeing “pictures” of my little guy, which really are just illustrations from my BabyBump app. Just one more visual for them to see how he is growing in my belly.

I asked some of my friends what they have done to prep older siblings and here’s the fabulous advice they provided:

Karen from Ferndale-Royal Oak Macaroni Kid said: “Our son was on the younger side (17 mos) when we brought our daughter home. We tried to keep any other big changes separated from this big event — for instance, we moved him to a toddler bed a few months prior, and made sure to be done with other home renovation/furniture-moving stuff around then, too. I had my husband holding our daughter when our little guy visited me and his sister in the hospital so that I could hug him right away unencumbered. And creating and sticking to his routine was super helpful.”

Regina from the Crazy Nuts Mom says: “I think spending one on one time with the kids AFTERwards — having mommy and me time — seemed to help a lot without the other one around.”

Amy of the Purseless Mama said: “Reese was just under three when Emery was born. I bought him a doctors kit so he could help take care of the baby and wrote “Big Brother’s Kit” on the front if it. He was into a MatchBox cars at the time so Emery “bought” him a pack of those. We were also gifted a recordable book about the birth of Jesus. Since she was born the week before Christmas it was perfect timing. Zac and I recorded our voices reading it to him and left him a message about how it was given to him on the day his sister was born.”

My friend Kate says: “We try to let the girls hug and kiss their baby brother whenever they ask to, and we’ve tried really hard to not say that we can’t do something with them because we’re doing something for him. (Sometimes that’s true, though, and requires some word smithing, lol!). I also agree with the above mention of a hospital gift “from the baby” for them – we did that as well, and the girls seemed so amazed that he knew what they liked…I told them it was because he had been listening to them all that time in my stomach.”

Overall, I can’t wait to see what happens when our baby boy is added to the mix — stay tuned! Bringing home a new baby is always a challenge, but I just know in my heart it’s one we’re ready for since I know this little man is the missing puzzle piece to complete our family. A little prayer or luck sent my way doesn’t hurt though 😉

How did you prepare your children for a new sibling? Tips appreciated!